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it has been pouring non-stop the whole day. heaven’s gates have opened its dams and its reservoirs isnt giving a slightest hint of giving up, far from it.

coincidentally it is THAT time of the year again. it is THE time of the season that i turn a year older.

i say to myself in a state of denial fashion time and again that it is a mathematical illusion.

but the thing is, it is not just a number. it is Gregorianically a landmark date of one’s life. it is the date in which a person comes into being. it is true that we might have lived an additional 9 months in the womb but only after the experience of birth is a person’s life becomes a factor in human history. becomes a significant speck of humanity. becomes an endless possibility towards greatness, tragedy or mediocrity.

i was watching a documentary on the making of a 1975 film called ‘The Message’ by Mustafa Akkad a few days back. i realised that whatever happens or happened to him, the 2 years of his life spent making the film negates the other (relatively) wasted life-span.

for the uninitiated you might want to think of Peter Jackson and the Lord of the Rings…

of course i can argue that the times before that landmark period of his time was at the very least a preparation and pre-requisital period. however, i shall be true to myself: myopic and unlateral and hence say with conviction that only his 73-75 period of life mattered.

the reason for that is to drill the notion that those two years worth of effort would cover what most of us would take 5 lifetimes to achieve. it is one great deed for mankind. introducing and documenting the life and times of Muhammad bin Abdullah. for the faithful, (if his intentions were at all honourable) he probably would have booked a spot in the Garden of Eden. for the atheist and agnostic, he probably had done a thomas edison for film.

i ask myself on this wet and glorious day, what have I done for humanity? zero, kosong, ziltch, nada, zafar…. nothing.

admittedly, the fact of life is, we mere mortals will end our lives as nobodies, accomplishing nothing worth mentioning in the history books. however, the history books arent and shouldnt be confined to the written medium. in other words, it doesnt mean that our lives have been and will be futile. it is our duty to make it meaningful if not for others at least for ourselves. we owe it to ourselves.

it doesnt have to be anything big. it doesnt even have to be medium sized. it can be the smallest and the simplest of acts. but what it needs to be is, at the end of the day, you will say to yourself:

i have done all i can, i have loved all i can, i have acted to the best of my ability and regrets i may have but i will not change a single part of it.

happy birthday avloomat.

Soundtrack of the day: Scarborough Affair by Simon and Garfunkel

Finger Acrobatics Perfomed by Avloomat at 0300Hrs

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